“You think you want to die
But in reality
You just want to be saved.”
I’ve been struggling once again (ahem, like always) with acceptance of this disease (chronic migraines). I’ve been hit with so many pain-filled days lately, without much of a break in between. And even on my “pain-free” days, I am still experiencing symptoms of prodrome and postdrome… either recovering from the pain, or dealing with symptoms that I know are going to lead to another horrible attack.
It’s really f-ing hard to deal with. I constantly battle with myself over every little thing: what to do, how to care for myself, which meds to take, if I should wait to take meds, if I should try to go to work, if I should hide it, if I should reach out to people… but isn’t everyone sick of hearing about my pain? Because I’m sick of feeling this pain that won’t leave me alone.
There is so much good in life… people, places, experiences… I’ll never give up.
I just wish life hurt less.