Can you believe it’s been FOUR MONTHS since I wrote anything?!
Life is in this strange Twilight Zone. Anyone else feel it?
I’ve been staying home as much as possible. I’m in California in the U.S., so we went into Lockdown officially on March 19th. After that, a few things slowly re-opened, but I’m still staying home as much as possible.
I am staying sane, hallelujah! Although it has been very rough. But isn’t life always rough, if you’re living with chronic migraine attacks? (…yes. The answer is yes, for me! Always!)
I miss when things were normal, but I’m trying to find the positives in this situation. With classes being moved online, I find it more flexible with my health issues. So that’s been nice.
I also find that I’m having less FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) … because everything is closed or big events are canceled. So I’m not the only one missing out… we all are. It’s a collective experience of FOMO, which makes it sting a little less.
I hope if you are reading this, that life is treating you well, and that you are also staying sane in these crazy times. I hope you have a cute mask to wear. And I hope you’re extra nice to yourself and that you’re *treating yourself* because you deserve it!
Not doing so great over here. Migraine flare up, depression flare up, anxiety flare up. And not supposed to leave the house.
So now I’m just sitting in my room 24/7, thinking depressive/anxious thoughts, and trying to deal with migraine attacks.
That’s life right now. I’ll try to survive it, but I’m not sure how sane I can stay.
Sending out love and positive vibes to everyone reading this. We could all use some love and positive vibes.
It’s almost my birthday (which is March 12th) and I’m trying to get excited about it.
Life’s just been really rough lately.
So I want to say “thank you” to you, for reading this. The chronic migraine life can feel SO lonely. Thank you for helping me feel less alone. I love you.
First of all… Happy New Year! It’s 2020 now, can you believe it?
February is almost over already.
So what’s new with me?
Another semester of school started. I’m taking one class and I’m doing a part-time unpaid internship.
The best part about my internship? ….Most of the work is done at home. And it’s very rewarding work. My mentors are really smart and interesting people.
The rest of my life? Nothing new there. If you read my last few entries, it’s all the same stuff. I’m still very depressed. I’m still dealing with chronic migraines. I even had one of those scary middle-of-the-night attacks last night, and almost went to the hospital. I’m in the middle of a very bad 2 week flare up too. So I’m feeling very lonely and isolated in my bedroom/cave.
It’s just a hard life, to deal with this much pain. It feels so pointless, this torture. But I’m still here. I’m still alive. And I’m trying my best to hang on. Even though I’m too sick to work a traditional job, at the very least I get out of the house for school and the internship. I made the decision to go back to school last year and even though it’s been really *really* hard, it’s also been helping me stay sane.
Sometimes, I wish I was an introvert or a homebody type person. I feel like having this debilitating disease is even harder to deal with, because my nature is to be outside, to be around people, and to never be home. Does anyone else have this struggle?
So yeah, I’m an emo girl right now, but what’s new?